Dr. Mara Kapel - The Passionate Life: Creating Vitality and Joy at Any Age
Content Courtesy of the Forever Young Podcast with Christiana Egi and Cherrie-Marie Chiu.
In our most recent Forever Young Podcast, we are joined by Dr. Mara Kapel from Austin, Texas. She is a clinical psychologist, speaker, and author of the international bestseller, The Passionate Life: Creating Vitality and Joy at Any Age, and host of the internet radio show, Dr. Mara Kapel and Your Golden Years. She has been named the passionate living motivator for the organization Compassionate Austin, and she's a contributing blogger to Thrive Global, Huffington Post, and more. Dr. Mara has been working with adults of all ages for over 30 years and specializes in working with seniors, caregivers, and veterans. She now has the title of a family member as she navigates advocating for her 94-year-old mom who resides in a nursing home. The title of Dr Mara’s book, The Passionate Life: Creating Vitality and Joy at Any Age resonates very well with what we do here on our Forever Young podcast, where we promote living life with a Forever Young mindset at any age. Listen to the full podcast below:
Before Dr. Mara chose her current path as a clinical psychologist, she wanted to become a civil engineer. She shared her story of how she ended up from civil engineering to becoming a psychologist. Dr Mara shared that she chose that field because it was 1980 and that was when they were hiring a lot of women in the fields of engineering. Her father was an engineer and she was good at math, which made her think this was something she wanted to study. She still felt like she needed to be in a field where she was able to relate to people.
In her sophomore year of college, a friend of hers saw a sign at the Student Union Center that they were interviewing for students to join the peer counseling center to become a peer counselor. She went in for an interview, they accepted her, and she went through a semester of training. Throughout her two years of peer counseling, there was only one student that was suicidal. Dr. Mara spent two hours convincing him not to hurt himself and was able to get him to walk with her to the health center where the professionals were, and to get more help. It was at that moment that she realized that she had a gift to help people in need, and this was something she was capable of doing. That night she called her parents and let them know she wanted to switch her major to psychology, and then get her Ph.D. in Clinical Psychology. Although they were surprised, they were both supportive of her decision. Dr Mara remembers her mother reminding her this is not an easy path, however, at the age of 19, she was sure this was something she can indeed do. It took eight years to get through graduate school. About four years in she was ready to give up but she didn’t want to waste the years she put in, which kept her going.
Although it took a while to be comfortable with her decision, Dr. Mara is happy with her decision to become a psychologist. There is a story behind every author’s book, Dr Mara also shared what led her to write The Passionate Life: Creating Vitality and Joy at Any Age.
Dr. Mara has always wanted to write a book. She always thought she would write mysteries, but as she started really reading into it it seemed more complicated than she expected. When she moved to Texas, she started really thinking about her experience as a psychologist working with older adults. She expanded to working not only in nursing homes but in assisted and independent living. She realized that there was a common thread through all of her clients which was that everybody wants to feel a sense of purpose. She noticed that when someone found their sense of purpose, they didn't need her anymore, they stopped feeling depressed, the reason that she saw them, no longer existed. This was true for the young and old - People live a long time when they were when they live in independent living.
This led her to write about finding that sense of purpose. She loved writing and that became a part of her purpose as well. During the time she was writing the book, she also started her radio program. Getting to meet all these different experts and authors on her show gave her a lot more insight and the opportunity to ask questions. Dr Mara combined all that information into her book, for people who are her age, a little bit younger, a little bit older. She hopes her book will make everyone realize that we can feel happy and have a sense of passion and joy - if we start younger, that is all the better, because we'll be healthier when we get older.
“Having purpose is a part of living with passion. ”
When you feel as if you do not have a purpose, it can make your body sick. First, it can start with stress and depression. Then it can express itself in physical symptoms and make it bigger and harder to diagnose. But when you get that purpose and joy, it as the title book says, brings vitality into their life, and they suddenly get this boost of energy.
When she first started writing the book, she had a different idea of passion, and it has evolved over time, especially during COVID. Because a lot of people were feeling like their passion had gone away during COVID; Dr Mara was interviewing musicians on the program who felt like they couldn't perform and now feel signs of depression. The purpose is a central part of the passion, but also doing what you enjoy doing can bring joy into the world. You also can't have passion without compassion.
As we get older, we spend more time by ourselves which can make it harder to find a new sense of purpose. We talk a lot about finding passion through activities and hobbies on our podcast, like starting gardening or doing a sport like pickleball. At Alexis Lodge, we do a lot of dancing which gives its residents purpose, It is something residents look forward to every time!
Sometimes we may feel dissatisfied in life because we are not achieving our true potential. Dr. Mara shares that if we change that feeling to a feeling of curiosity, we can get closer to finding our purpose and true potential. Having a childlike curiosity can help not just your brain but help you get closer to achieving your goals. You don’t have to be good at everything you try, but trying it can help you achieve much more! When you are passionate about something, it will bring you happiness. Even if it is your job, you are able to enjoy being there. One thing we should try to aim for is to find that passion for ourselves. Finding purpose and passion are so important - they go hand in hand with enjoying a longer life and staying forever young!
Listen to Dr. Mara’s internet radio program Dr. Mara Kapel and Your Golden Years here. You can also listen to Dr. Mara’s podcast with Christiana Egi (The founder of Alexis Lodge Toronto, Canada) here.
The Forever Young podcast was created and produced by Christiana Egi and Cherrie Marie Chiu. Produced and engineered by Elisse Hill. The podcast represents our opinions and those of our guests. The content should not be taken as medical advice. It is for informational purposes only. Please consult your healthcare professional for any medical questions. If you like our show, please tell your friends and leave a five-star review on Apple Podcasts. New episodes are available every other Wednesday. Have questions? Email us at ourforeveryoungpodcast@gmail.com.
